


Thorough

by Viridian5



Category: Andromeda
Genre: Alien Character(s), Alien Culture, Humor, Multi, Orgy, Plot What Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-10-10
Updated: 2001-10-10
Packaged: 2017-10-02 07:20:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian5/pseuds/Viridian5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The crew surprises Dylan with their attention to detail.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thorough

**Author's Note:**

> PWP, folks. I made the mistake of saying how different that _Enterprise_ Pilot decon room scene would have been if done by the Andromeda crew, so Kass and 'nat batted their eyelashes at me until I agreed to write it. Suggestions from LaT and Erica helped me tighten it up.
> 
> This is definitely first season. Tiny spoiler for "The Pearls That Were His Eyes."

"Do they think we have cooties or something?" I asked as I let the tablet dissolve under my tongue. It had a disgusting chalky flavor, a lot like other things I've let dissolve under my tongue over the years, but those were hallucinogenics and worth the sacrifice, thank you very much.

"It's nothing personal," Dylan said, while Rommie answered, "Microphobia and pathophobia are engrained in the Anxiete culture. In entering into diplomatic talks with them, we have to respect their precautions."

"I think xenophobia might be another thing engrained in there. _Everybody_ hates germs and diseases. And you can be all cool about it since you don't have to do any of this."

Rommie smiled. "There are many benefits to being a synthetic lifeform."

"Suck it up, Seamus. We all have to do this," Beka said, then made a face at the taste. "Makes me wish I'd stayed on the ship with Rev though."

"You can complain, but I can't?" I asked. Dylan had his long-suffering look on, which I was far enough gone on him to think looked cute. I'd be more of an object of pity for my sappiness if I didn't actually have him as my very own private High Guard captain, though.

"This is all pointless," Tyr declaimed. He was always declaiming something or other, Nietzscheans being the drama queens they are.

"I think it's an interesting flavor," Trance said.

"You would, your perky purpleness," I answered.

Then jars of blue gel came up through a hatch in the table. A disembodied voice said, "Now you will go to our decon room through the door to your left and apply the gel to yourselves thoroughly. Once you've finished we'll be ready to meet. To preserve your modesty," and forestall objections, probably, "we do not have that room under surveillance. But we _will_ know if you apply the gel."

Beka looked pissed, Tyr annoyed, and Dylan had this affronted thing going. Trance just looked interested, while Rommie seemed to be really amused.

Guess my reaction. Just guess. "No. Way," I said. "This is just like some old horror vid I saw once. 'It will apply the lotion to its skin.'"

Normally Beka would say something like that it wasn't _exactly_ like the vid because the girl there had been kept prisoner in a deep hole, but here she was angry enough to go along. "How many hoops will we have to jump through for these people?"

"It'll be worth it," Dylan said, but I think we all heard him follow that up with a muttered, "It better be."

Trance clicked off her scanner. "The gel seems to be safe for us to use."

I opened the jar and took a deep sniff. Stuff smelled nice, kind of like spiced rum. I was starting to see possibilities. "So the Anxietes want us to lube ourselves up? What kind of welcome do they have planned?"

"I'm sure it won't be as interesting as you're thinking," Dylan said. Sounded like being diplomatic was wearing on him.

I had ways of cheering him up. I briefly touched the gel with the tip of my tongue. Gave my tongue a little tingle, but I didn't keel over dead or anything.

Trance shrugged. "It's safe for that too."

"Harper, you're disgusting," Beka said. Dylan looked kind of turned on, though.

Like I said, possibilities. "Thank you. Tastes kind of like root beer," I answered.

"Ew."

"You know not of what you speak, Beka."

Dylan saw where I was going with this, I could tell, but he kept up the stoic, dignified captain's face. All business. Let's see how long that lasted.

  


* * *

So we stripped down to our skivvies. Tyr... Tyr, I guess, was big on avoiding visible panty lines because he wore what looked like a posing pouch and thong under his leather pants. Tyr was big in general. When Beka caught me looking, she muttered, "Size queen much?" in my ear while I muttered back that she could talk once _she_ stopped drooling.

Just because I had Dylan as my one true squeeze didn't mean I'd gone blind.

Wonder if I could use the visible panty line argument to make Dylan switch from his admittedly admirably filled tighteys to something thong-ish. With his ass and assets, he sure as hell could work it.

My cock associated Dylan in his underwear with getting some, so I was glad my boxers were roomy.

Beka and Trance just had dull, serviceable underwear I'd seen lots of times before, even if they did look really good wearing it. We had open crew quarters on the Maru, so everybody found out what everybody else had. Besides, salvage runs could get pretty damned boring and sometimes we needed recreation.

I might have to surgically remove Rommie's eyebrow from her hairline the way she was going. She'd meet us on the other side. I told her that she could help foster crew camaraderie by stripping along with us anyway, but she just gave me a withering look.

The rest of us each took a jar and walked in. The room's dim, shadowy porno lighting made me smirk. Maybe these Anxiete guys had something here.

Tyr turned into a whirlwind of motion and slicked himself up in minutes while we just stared. Giving us a look to make sure we understood how inferior we were in the face of super Nietzschean gelling action, he then ambled his muscular, thong-clad ass out of there, not needing _our_ help.

Of course I watched. I mentioned that I wasn't blind. Then I said, "Hey, Dylan, want me to do the middle of your back? Must be hard for you to reach."

I could see him thinking that he should refuse, but then Trance, bless her, asked Beka to help her cover her tail. See? Innocent, Dylan. Schyeah, right.

"I can do my own back, Harper."

He wasn't playing back. Damn. Well, I still had a few tricks up my-- well, I wasn't actually wearing sleeves now, but you know. I took a dollop of warm, blue gel and let fly. At the small of Beka's back, which it hit with a plopping sound. She gave me a murderous look and volleyed some of her own at me. Things escalated. Dylan, sporting that stiff look he gets when he's trying not to crack up laughing, tried to stop us, but we kept slipping through his fingers. Literally. Felt good.

Soon enough, Beka and I had dragged him and Trance to the floor with us, and we were all smearing gel on one another. It left me feeling tingly and loose and horny and slippery, and I wanted Dylan to feel the same way too, so I slid my hands under his waistband and stroked the stuff into his skin. "How can we get every millimeter of skin when we have our underwear on?" I asked. So Trance pulled my boxers off. "Uh, thanks, Trance." She giggled and went back to kissing Beka's stomach. "See, I went first."

I watched Dylan realize the lay of the land. "We're here on a diplomatic mission, not for an orgy."

"Quick orgy." When I kissed him, his lips already tasted like root beer and made my tongue tingle. Oh yeah, we'd smeared him up good. Not good enough though. My own cock twitched as I stroked his already hard cock from base to tip. "Besides, we have to make sure we get it everywhere, remember?" His slick skin gleamed wetly under the dim blue lighting and felt so good, though nobody should have a stomach as firm as his. It wasn't human.

He tried to move out from under my stroking fingers, but not even the slick gave him what he needed to escape me. Not when I was focused like this. So he sounded a little breathless as he said, "Harper, need I remind you--"

"--that we're on a planet for some diplomatic thing with a bunch of tight-assed people who get off on making us do embarrassing stuff? You don't. I get it."

"What then?" He tried not to smile as I applied gel to the outer rim of his ears. "I can reach there, you know."

"Yeah, yeah."

I tightened my grip on his cock and stroked harder, wringing a groan out of him. "You're not playing fair," he said.

"As if I play fair every other time? _Any_ other time?" I settled into his lap and breathed in his ear, "You look tense and pissed off over the situation they put us in, and I am too. I wanna help relax you. It's private here. Won't they be knocked off their game a bit if you walk out with a big smile on your face?"

Eyes dazed with lust, already holding onto me, Dylan didn't have much resistance left in him. "Rationalizations."

"Learned it from watching you."

He snorted but writhed under all the stroking, kissing, and grinding I was doing. Since he didn't seem to have many complaints with the attention, I whipped off his tighteys. "Besides, we don't want to miss a spot. They said they'd know. And I'm already naked here. Wouldn't be fair for me to be sitting here naked while you're still dressed." Actually, Trance and Beka had already stripped all the way down and were going at it enthusiastically, but why mention that to Dylan when he had all his focus on kissing my neck?

"But _I_ have to be fair?"

"Yes."

"Harper...." he said in his "last, lingering objection before I give in" voice.

I ground myself against his cock as I stroked gel down the curves of his ass. "Do me," I said as I circled his rim with my fingers, then slipped them into the hot grip of his body. We needed the stuff put on everywhere, right? He bucked up and grabbed me. We slid against one another, my fingers and cock thrusting into him as his cock thrust and rubbed against me. Bliss.

A muffled sound from Beka made me turn my head a little. Beka and Trance were also kissing and finger-fucking. Though Trance used her tail too, which she was really good with. The first time I saw for myself that Beka's nanobots only concerned themselves with the hair on her head, I had to be smacked back into focus on what I was doing. Her hair's _really_ red.

Damn, they looked hot together, Beka writhing as Trance's fingers worked her and Trance's tail caressed her skin....

A growled "Harper" and a very insistent hand on my cock yanked my attention back to Dylan. Not that I'd stopped thrusting. In fact, watching Beka and Trance had sped me up a bit, driven me a bit wilder. Dylan twisted on my fingers like he liked it.

But Dylan was a linear, mono-focused guy, so he appreciated having my full focus on him, which I couldn't blame him for. There was a lot to him to pay attention to anyway, seeing as how he was good and witty and passionate and gorgeous and seemed to enjoy touching me. I even loved the way he smelled, with or without spiced rum gel. He was just... really, really good, you know? But not _too_ good.

And he gets it that I'm all over the place, that _I'm_ not mono-focused or linear or even on the same thought train at the same time as every other sentient being. Have to love that.

Hell, multi-focus let me think how lucky I was even while Dylan's sure touch on my tingling skin melted me and I reciprocated by driving him crazy. Multi-tasking. Sometimes I got really good inspirations during sex.

Never had anyone look at me the way he does, warm and hot all at once. His look just got hotter and hotter as I worked him, and he thrust into my fist and pushed down on my fingers, knowing exactly what he wanted and not shy about getting it. Wanton and really willing, yeah. Vocal too. Dylan wasn't as repressed as most people might think; he just compartmentalized his life into different directories.

His sex directory was pretty damned expansive.

He finally went over, moaning out my name, which Does Things for me every time, then jerked me just the way I liked, hard and fast and with a twist of his big hands, until I came too.

Then I curled up against Dylan, who looked loose and very relaxed, and watched Beka bring Trance off with her mouth. Dylan looked surprised by it and surprised by my total lack of surprise but said nothing, though we'd probably hear about it later. And how flattering is it to my ego that he didn't notice all the hot chick action until after I was done with him?

Once they finished, Beka, troublemaker that she was, slid over to Dylan and said, "Hey, did you know that we once made Harper come twice in three minutes by having Trance finger-fuck him and lightly asphyxiate him with her tail?"

"Really," Dylan said dryly.

"Beka!" I protested, then jumped as Trance's tail slithered behind my neck for a moment. Trance just gave me a sunny smile. "You're making me sound like some kind of slut." They all looked at me. "Oh, bite me."

  


* * *

The gel absorbed into our skin pretty quickly, leaving only a tingly fresh feeling, so we dressed soon afterward. Stuff flattened my hair though, and after all the trouble I took spiking it just the way I liked it before we arrived here.

Tyr looked annoyed as we walked out, Rommie confused, and the Anxietes amused. Dylan would be pissed if it turned out that they'd lied about the surveillance, but maybe they'd guessed what we'd done just from the time it took us.

Dylan did his dignified captain face and voice as he said, "We had to be thorough." Damn, I loved him.

 

### End


End file.
